which
is run by a friend of mine, David Newton. I will have an article
posted there in the near future, so watch out for it.
There's
interesting
events like a group walk through Brisbane across the Story Bridge and ending
in a coffee shop.
How's
that for a great way to meet new friends and get to know people?
Dear
Reader
Okay,
here is the March edition. I swear I'll get these done on time one
of these days! but hey, I did it with this one! Even if you did
get January's today as well, and you do get to live in suspense for
production date, that's exciting
isn't it?
Easter
is looming fast, and I am going to Mackay to visit my Dad, who's 88
years young. I love him dearly and as we never know when we are
going to depart this place for other worlds, it will be nice to catch
up.
I
have a bit of a different view of death - I think of it like a doorway
to another energetic dimension, so that person has never really left, if
we want to talk to them on a mental level. Feels nice to do that,
too.
May
your Easter be a relaxing break, an adventure, a holiday, a catch-up
time, in short, whatever you want it to be, is what you can decide upon.
Warm
regards Narelle
I
do... I do not... want to commit
Commitment
phobia occurs when someone decides they don't want to take this
relationship to the next step... And guess who decides what the
next step is? Usually the commitment phobic party!
There
are many kinds of commitment and therefore levels of commitment, but in
general I am writing of the person who says, I don't want to take this
relationship any further than X. And X may be: dating irregularly,
dating monogamously, engagement but not marriage and so on.
Is
your fear preventing Commitment?
Underneath
is often fear, fear of being swamped, losing independence, feeling
stifled or cramped, unable to be spontaneous, fear of financial loss if
it doesn't work out, yet the commitment phobe doesn't realise that what
they fear will eventually be drawn to him or her, so that it becomes a
test or a battle.
Can
over-commitment cause problems?
Think
of how opposites attract... Yep, you guessed it, the commitment phobic
party is often attracted to the over-committed party... Now what
happens? You'll end up with two people who want different things,
but who need to balance it out between them! Are they in for some
fun? You bet!
To
someone with my training it is obvious how we end up like this, but it
is not so obvious to those who are in that situation.
Think
of the absent father, whom you want to please and want him to stay home
more often..
Think
of the over-protective mother, who smother loved you..
Think
of how it would feel to know that your mother contemplated an
abortion, when you were in the womb...
What
would it be like, if every partner you ever had, cheated on you?
The
commitment phobic will say any of the following:
I
like my freedom
I'm
happy, leave me alone
I
like my life it's comfortable
I
don't have time for a full-time commitment
and
fail to recognise that there is a problem, and in fact deny that a
problem exists!
The
over-committed may express it this way:
I
just want to spend more time with you
I
just need to know that you really love me
Why
can't we live together?
Please
don't ever leave me...
The
over-committed cannot understand that you like your space, and you
cannot understand how the over-committed doesn't seem to need space.
Now,
what can you do about this?
Release
your fears!
For
that, you will both need to release past fears - fears of being swamped,
or abandoned, and those fears are usually rooted in childhood, birth and
even when you were in the womb, being carried by your mum.
Begin
by affirming that you are completely safe and protected, and make an
appointment to see me (or get the other party in your life, or someone
you know to book in) so that they can also release old emotional
baggage, and learn new ways of being and behaving!
Call
for an appointment now and let go of this issue!
There
is a lengthy article on Commitment Phobia (written by Narelle) going up on www.simplysolo.com
website in the near future, so click through and check it out.
